I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
