i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
After you pregamed and were plastered you saw the cop was parked illegally so you gave him a citizens arrest
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I knew something was wrong when santa got arrested
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Randomize
