i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
Randomize
