I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
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