Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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