it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize
