she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
But I got head on a boat yesterday which was sweet until a bald eagle flew over. Then it became life affirming.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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