fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Randomize
