would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
And then I remembered we banged to Beethoven & I was like you will never get this ass again
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
