i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
You're talking to someone who was 80% serious about breaking into someone's house and leaving a cat there with our names in a heart tag on its collar
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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