Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
