I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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