Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
Best part about losing weight and not fitting into your pants any longer? They come off quick for chipotle emergencies.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
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