forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Is this like a preordered booty call?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
Randomize
