3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
Randomize
