He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
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