but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
Stuck in the Dallas airport. At the bar. Everytime a flight to DC gets cancelled, I'm takin a shot. Fuck you snow.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
Randomize
