Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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