too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
My pussy is not your playground.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
I woke up this morning and my house is covered in shredded cheese with my laptop open and a google image search for "awesome shit".
Randomize
