he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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