Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
I'm on a treadmill at the gym ordering pizza on my phone so it'll get to my house around the time I get home. I NEED HELP. Or I'm a genius. I haven't decided.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I'm hungover during 4th grade graduation practice. I AM THEIR FUTURE.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
