Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I passed out in the VIP room and she charged me for 17 songs until I woke up, theres a bouncer asking me for $700, fuck tequila
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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