Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I have to pee in a cup in the morning and they are going to say....you just peed a miller light. I'm going to hang my head in shame and say yes...yes I did.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Randomize
