i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
Randomize
