so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
