I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
You are allergic to dogs. DO NOT kidnap something you are allergic to. No matter how fluffy.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
