I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Just trying to show you I care.
Isn't it supposed to be "what would you like for dinner?" instead of "how do you take your blow?"
Hey, you're the one who asked me to mc to move in.
Randomize
