i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Everything about him screamed your future.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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