Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
The sorting hat of life was not kind to you.....
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
