it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
