miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
my poor anus
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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