He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Why were you doing tequila shots out of Boston Pizza dip containers?
how does that bad decision feel?
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
Randomize