If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
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