I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
It tastes like you we're too lazy to shower and instead just sprayed yourself with Febreeze.
You have a very discerning palate.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
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