What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
My professor really needs to stop abbreviating. I'll never remember what "Fun. Anal. Trade-offs?" means when i study.
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
friends who go to the bar together leave the bar together and im not leaving you behind ohana means family
Randomize
