I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
