so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
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