whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
The last bar we left there was a sausage stand right outside and I apparently felt bad those guys were working that late, so I bought a $9 sausage, gave it to some drunk kid and said "I support local businesses!!" I'd say I've done my civic duty.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
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