he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
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