I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
Randomize
