no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
Randomize
