Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Randomize
