whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Randomize
