When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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