Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
Found an earplug stuck to the inside of my thigh this afternoon. Just how much noise were we making?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
IM A DRUNK BIRTHDAY CLEOPATRA MESS. CELEBRATE THAT BITCH
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
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