I wanna passion pit in your ass
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
Mental note: adding peach schnapps to a gin and tonic does not "water it down."
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
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