I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
