Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
I'm eating cheerios out of the palm of my hand while I pee with the door open. Is this adulthood?
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
