I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Fair warning, if I start singing "Kiss Me, I'm Shitfaced" at any point tomorrow, just go with it
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
