I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize
