I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize
